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Link Love #1
I used to read novels within days of each other, and would get so intrgiued with a story that I couldn’t focus on anything else unil I finished it. Then life happened, I got a job, I found travel.. yada yada..
I never seem to have time to actually sit down and read enough of a novel to get hooked before having to put it down and think about something else. That’s why I love reading blogs and I usually end up learning at least something from each one that I read. My bloglovin’ collection is quite the mixture I must say but that’s what keeps everything exciting and interesting!
I thought that I woudl share some of the links I found interesting this week!
Life
9 WAYS TO THRIVE AT LIFE WHEN YOU MOVE BACK HOME
I’m currently dreading moving back home in a month or so. I mean, I’m looking forward to being back in the comfort of my hometown, family and especially reunited with my car… but thinking about living in my house again, stresses me out to say the least.
After working as a server for the past 3 years it’s insane how true these misconceptions are!
If you’re a true foodie, you’ll watch this video and be like “yep, that’s me..that’s me too, oh and yep, once again” At least that’s how I felt through it!
MAYOLESS TUNA SALAD, THREE WAYS
I hate mayonnaise but I LOVE tuna, so i’m pretty sure that these recipes will be calling my name sooner than later!
Health/Recovery
Demi Lovato Opens Up about Mental Disorder
I Absolutely love everything about Demi Lovato and have so much respect for her being so open about her mental illness.
WELLNESS WEDNESDAY: THE PROBLEM WITH THE BIKINI BODY
I feel like this is an extremely important read especially since “bikini season” is approaching. Honestly, I can admit that every summer that comes along my mindset shifts and I do have the desire to either tone up, eat better or lose weight… which let’s be honest neither of those I need will not do.
I love reading Izzy’s posts on recovery. She’s super blunt and clear cut which is easy to relate to in my own case anyways. Reading this post about how we often see things as being all or nothing really made me realize how relevant it is in my own life as well.
Lauren Conrad Not on Board with Body-Shaming words
Hallelujah. I love Lauren Conrad and no not just because she’s gorgeous beyond belief, but because she’s real. She’s not trying to be someone she’s not, and she stands up for what she believes in. I highly respect her decision to remove her labels from her website and it’s gotten me thinking myself on my own choices.
Travel
8 underground city trips in Europe
As much as I hate being underground discovering new cities is something I live for.
Five Reasons France is the Perfect Place to Picnic
I can 100% say that this is so true! Since being in Paris for the past 10 months I’ve had so many lovely picnics and they have been the best of my life. Whether its on the banks along the seine or in one of the many parks in the city, I always enjoy myself.
Stay tuned for some exciting changes happening to my blog in the near future!
Stress and Perfectionism
From the moment I had opened my eyes in the morning I was already adding unneeded stress by trying to be as productive as I felt I should be. The idea of being perfect became my daily goal, but was never achieved because nothing was ever considered to be good enough.
No matter what I did or how much I succeeded I always felt that there was something more I couldn’t done to be essentially “Perfect”
Normal daily tasks that are simple to a typical human being became stressful as I made them more complicated than they needed to be.
It got to the point where I couldn’t go to the bathroom without taking my cell phone. As if I was being that much more productive by the whole 20 seconds I was in there.
Surfing the web soon became more work than play. My internet explorer was full of tabs every time I opened my computer and I couldn’t stay on my page any longer than 20 seconds before flipping to the next. Listening to lectures for school was the worst and I would have my cell phone out at the same time once again trying to do as much as I could.
I ignored people; I stopped being social. I felt that during that time with my friends I could be doing something much more productive instead of essentially wasting time with my friends. This ended in the loss of many relationships.
But what was the worst?
Exercise became a chore.
Sports, well exercise in general, were once the best things in my life. When I lost myself to this illness, I lost my love for what made me truly happy.
You see people everyday pushing themselves to do exercise unwillingly. People walking on the treadmill while scrolling through Facebook or catching up on the latest news on the big screen TV’s in front of them. Never did I think that I would become a part of that stereotype.
What happened to mindfully exercising for the pleasure of nourishing our bodies and for the simple endorphin’s we earn? We strive to be better, to be more productive, to be the best that we can be in order to fit
Personally it got so bad that I would tell myself I needed to go for a walk to “clear my head” yet the whole time I would be scrolling through my Instagram which inevitably was stressing me out even more without even realizing it. I mean I couldn’t do a plank without grabbing my cell phone to scroll through my feed once again.
This wasn`t the life that I wanted to live for the rest of my life and I knew that.
I want to enjoy exercise, I want to enjoy the time with friends and I want to enjoy life.
Incredibly all of those things that I want are possible, but only if, I myself, put the effort into making change.
5 months and many self induced changes
It’s possible, don’t let anyone tell you any different
Curiosity time:
- Do you feel you stress yourself out?
- What coping mechanisms are you using?
Intuitive Eating
I love food especially a lot of different varieties of food.
but for a while, too long to be honest….
I was in a rut of eating the same things over and over again; convincing myself that that was all that my body wanted when really, I was just to stubborn to step out of my comfort zone and find enjoyment in food again.
The other day for breakfast I just wanted a salad with chicken, quinoa and lots of greens, so that’s what I ate at 8am in the morning.
Sometimes I crave my canadian pancakes with maple syrup,
Other days maybe I want a greasy pizza from a take away stand.
Either way, It really doesn’t matter to anyone but myself.
No one will judge me for eating what I love, enjoying food or listening to my body.
Simple as that.
By listening to my body and actually giving it what it craves, I’m nourishing it and i’m creating a healthy balance. By telling myself that is it wrong to want certain foods I’m doing the complete opposite.
I used to feel guilty for eating what I actually wanted when I was in the beginning stages of gaining weight because of the hateful responses I would get from the others.
“why don’t you ever eat a pint of ice cream”
or “why don’t you buy chocolate bars regularly”
oh and the classic “just eat a hamburger why don’t you”
what they don’t realize is those words are NOT encouraging and come off as being the complete opposite making you feel like you’re doing the wrong thing by not eating a certain food or following a “trend”
Imagine telling someone who’s trying to lose weight, to stop eating so much, or to just eat a salad already. You wouldn’t say that would you? Then why are people shaming the ones trying to gain weight by doing the same?
As a recovering orthorexic I’ve been that girl who ate salads day in and day out restricting my body from what it actually wanted, which for the most part was carbs. Oh the evil carbs.
Learning to eat intuitive has taken time and patience. My body was fed such a limited diet for so long, the cravings for other foods wasn’t an instant process. I started slow and introduced ice cream, chocolates, pizza, etc.. back into my life and have found what foods I actually enjoy eating and what ones my body tells me that it does want.
I fell into this really negative trap of mindless eating and still struggle with it each and everyday in some way or another. I have a tendency to consume food without making it an experience and actually enjoying the flavors and quality of what I’m eating.
Apparently I’m more satisfied with hearty savory foods as opposed to salty. I could eat pizza over pretzels or chips any day when given the choice but now I know what to choose.
When it comes to desserts I like cake over ice cream, does that make me any less of a person because I don’t want the Ben and Jerry’s?
Hell no.
The fact that I’m listening to my body and giving it what it wants shows more strength than following the crowd.
I started looking at food as fuel and not as just something that was going into my body.
Question time:
- Are you an intuitive eater?
- Have you found foods that you love but didn’t realize until you made the switch?
Putting your Health First
Two years of my life I tried to recover, but as you can see I wasn’t successful at that moment in time.I tried to go on living life as if there wasn’t anything wrong with how I was living; essentially in denial.
I went to university then the next year to college while working 2 jobs and still was convinced that I was putting enough effort into recovering but still couldn’t understand why I wasn’t getting better.
Apparently the light bulb never went off in my head.
The years that were supposed to be the best ones of my life were spent drinking disgusting light beers and watered down cocktails while my friends indulged and lived life.
I lost my love for the one sport that took me to university in the first place and ended up quitting before my year was up.
My 6 year relationship suffered, ending in a break up because I lost the desire to put any effort into making things work and focused on my “health”. I stop wanting to do things together because that meant stepping outside of the comfortable routine that I had made for myself.
Here I am 3 year later and what did I realize?
MY HEALTH NEEDS TO COME FIRST, not sometimes but ALWAYS
Having an eating disorder doesn’t just affect your eating habits, it has an affect on EVERY aspect of your life. When I say every, I mean literally everything from going to the bathroom, how you sleep at night to how you enjoy your vacation.
Oh Vacation… exactly what this past year has been for me
I came abroad thinking that everything would magically get better and that I would just indulge in all of the french food and life would be grand.
Yeah, think again. Having that mentality only fueled my disorder even farther until five months later I reached a point where enough was enough.
In the beginning (as in the first week) I truly indulged. I didn’t work out, I ate macarons, crepes, baguettes, cheese… you name it. Then as I became more comfortable with my surroundings my little vacation ended and life continued to fall back in place.
My birthday cake from September that I had two bites of…shame on me
I was alone during the days and once again in control of what I was eating and had the freedom to exercise whenever I wanted. I thought it was fine still in denial that this life was anything but positive.
I fell right back into the fitness community but this time decided that I wanted to be one of those girls with the amazing kayla itsines transformation. I spent my days scrolling and reloading images hashtagged #bbg to get “Inspiration” and “motivation” to push myself to do the workouts. I got stuck in the comparison trap which once again fueled my disordered eating and thoughts.
Along the way I met an amazing guy who changed my life, and really pushed me to make changes but sadly I pushed him away once again as I had done with every other guy that had come into my life.
When I went home at Christmas time and surprised my family, that was when it hit me; That I had not made 1 ounce of improvement in those 4 months abroad but yet got worse.
That January was when I finally decided to put this disorder to an end and focus primarily on making changes for my OWN health.
How did I do this?
I enrolled in nutrition school. You’re probably thinking “that’s stupid, she’s just going to learn more about nutrition and health” That’s true I have, but I’m learning the right way to do it this time around, and not relying on Instagram and Blogs to educate myself. Integrative Nutrition focuses on Bio-Individuality which has been HUGE for me in realizing that everyone truly does require their own diet and no two people are alike. It’s really helped with the comparison issues I was having.
Socially I needed to less introverted so I started proactively making plans to get me away from the house.
I stopped meal prepping and allowed myself to be more flexible and listen to my real hunger cues.
I no longer was trying to be a part of that #bbg community that seemed to be all of the rage at the time.
Food wise, I stopped restricting EVERYTHING. This was the hardest part for me in the beginning. I would be eating double the amount of the people around me, and often sneaking food to eat when they weren’t around because my body was often experiencing extreme hunger. I embraced the bloat and threw away all of the clothes that I had been holding onto as a sense of comfort.
By letting go of everything that had been dragging me down, I’m feeling stronger than I ever had when I was pushing my body to extreme measures that it didn’t deserve.
Trust me, things will not just magically get better unless you decide for yourself that you’re ready to make a change.
Be strong and put your health first.
I’m Curious:
- Have you noticed other aspects of your life being affected by your eating/exercise habits?
Seeking Help for Eating Disorders
As we become more health conscious as a society I personally believe that a higher level of awareness needs to be put on eating disorders. In the world today, It seems that either we’re faced with advertisements promoting the newest Mcdonald’s menu item or the hottest diet trend.
There is no balance.
An imbalance in life leads to more issues than we realize at times, especially medical ones without proper care.
I’ve been struggling for 3 1/2 years with an undiagnosed disorder after proactively seeking help from doctors and nutritionist to “gain weight”. Not once was the term eating disorder brought up in the multiple appointments I went to but there was a whole lot of “You’re eating so healthy”.
That was the problem. I was eating TOO healthy.
It disgusts me that lack of help there is for people suffering from these illnesses and how often they are overlooked or misunderstood. Like depression they are a mental illness and notice how I said “they” because there isn’t just one eating disorder out there, but yet more than we even understand enough to diagnose.
The other day I randomly scanned through the headlines in the news back home and came across this heading
Come to find out after reading more of the article, our government cut 23% of the funding for a group that actively helps those with eating disorders. This group provides support and guidance for schools and workers so they can relay the information to students and young people needing help.
In the article itself its states that these disorders are the third more common to affect adolescents but yet the support is not there. Also stated that since 2010 the number of patients rushed to the emergency room because of eating disorders has doubled each year.
Another Stat posted in a previous article posted by the province
“According to a parliamentary report released in November, eating disorders are the most fatal mental illness in Canada”
DING DING.
These disorders on on the rise, not on the decline meaning more support and attention needs to be put on helping those in need, not less. More often than not, those suffering are unaware of the extent of their disorder and do not proactively seek help or want to admit there is a problem.
Personally I was unaware that I was in need of support and thankfully snapped into my senses before it was too late and needed medical attention, but what about those who don’t? What happens to them?
Apparently It seems that in my province, absolutely nothing. We let them suffer until they require medical attention costing the country more in return than what it would to have given funding for support in the first place.
This is wrong, and more action desperately needs to be taken.
My healthy is not your healthy
We judge. Its human nature. Sadly the judgements we make about others often are negative because we base their choices off of our own. We have perceptions on how life should be, how we should dress and how we should treat other people. When it comes to our eating habits and exercise we seem to judge as well, I mean like I said it’s human nature. Can we change that? I believe so.
Take a look at this video below.
When I first watched this video I thought it was stupid and unrealistic but really… that’s exactly what goes on in today’s world. We are constantly putting ourselves down because of our behaviors that we feel are negative simply because of how we base of perceptions on perfection.
These women feel they have been “bad” because they essentially went against what society leads us to believe is the healthiest way of living, but what we need to realize is that there is not one right way to be healthy. Being an intuitive eater and shaming the people who follow an iifym lifestyle is WRONG just as it is in the reverse sense. Just because you don’t follow the particular diet of someone else doesn’t mean that they are doing anything wrong or bad, in fact if they’ve been able to find a balance that works for them, than they’re actually doing it right.
Some people can’t consume gluten, does that mean that because I can that I should think any less of them or belittle their choices? NO.
If someone eats a pint of Ben and Jerry’s ice cream yet I eat a pot of yogurt does that make me “Healthier” than them? NO. I don’t even want to count the amount of times
I’ve gone out with friends for dinner and I would order a salad and they would get a pasta dish without even thinking twice. My brain wanted to believe that because I was ordering a salad that I was making the better choice as opposed to them. Boy was I ever wrong…
Looking back, I think I was more jealous of their ability to have the strength to order what they actually wanted instead of what I felt I had to eat in order to live the “healthiest” life possible. I would often wish that I could order pizza and snack on ice cream and still be healthy but my self control wouldn’t allow me to indulge.
Little did i realize that I CAN be healthy and enjoy the foods I want, because MY healthy isn’t based on anything else except what I create it to be. If my friends want to order a salad and I want a hamburger and my body can accept that hamburger, then gosh why shouldn’t I give my body the nutrients it craves and deserves.
We need to learn to accept that our own diet that works for us is not the only right way to live as we’re all unique. Stop the diet shaming, and instead find your fit.
Extreme hunger after a Restrictive Diet
I like to think that my eating habits are a mix between emotional eating and extreme hunger but realistically I know it is because of my past restrictive eating habits. I find that when I’m stressed, tired or even bored I turn to food even when I am not the least bit hungry. This is because my body is out of balance but also because it wants the food that I didn’t allow it to have for so long.
Recently I stopped exercise cold turkey because of an injury, yet I find my extreme hunger has gotten even worse which mentally is hard to process BUT completely normal.
So what exactly is extreme hunger?
When you have put your body through the a restrictive phase of any sort and you start to re introduce foods along with an increase in calories you body you may experience moments where you feel out of control with the food you are putting in your body. These moments can happen anytime throughout the recovery process whether during the day, throughout the night, in the beginning of recovery or even once you’ve hit your goal weight.
Let’s be clear, that why these moments may seem like binges, they are not.
When I first started experiencing these crazy hunger “pains” I thought I was completely alone. Why? Because I was comparing myself to everyone else I saw that I assumed was in the same situation I was in. I would see people classifying their 400 calorie hunger strike as a binge, and here I would have thousands of calories and try and compare myself to them, when in fact I shouldn’t.
I couldn’t understand why I was eating 3000 calories a day and then still having this so called “binges” at night. I would see others eating these perfect little bowls of cereal as their night snack and start to feel bad about my own eating habits. This is why I have had to really focus on not comparing myself and my progress with others.
I think it’s normal as humans not to want to show the world our flaws so many go unnoticed because we hide them in order to come across as being “perfect” or at least striving to be a certain way. The fact of the matter is, is that Recovery isn’t beautiful, it’s not fun but it’s possible if you focus on you and allow yourself to trust your body.
Personally I’m never physically hungry when I experience extreme hunger which may sound odd but it’s the truth. I may not physically have the cues to tell me to eat, but mentally my body is hungry for the nutrients and lets you know with EH.
I also find that when I’m bored, anxious, or stressed and find myself turn to food without the ability to stop. I’ll eat until I’m painfully full which makes sleeping extremely hard. I’ve experienced night sweats, swollen hands and feet, and marks all over my body from water retention but this is the process… and whether I want to like it or not, it’s essential in order to get to the next step.
Some people don’t experience bloating or extreme hunger.
Some may gain on 1000 while others on 3000.
For me, I seemed to get it all. Lucky right?
Actually I believe so. These symptoms are a way of assurance for me, in the sense that I’m making progress and I’m continuously pushing forward instead of falling behind.
Its been almost two months now of fully committing to putting the effort in to recover from my restrictive habits and I can say the bloating has gone down ever so slightly, but is no where near where I would like it to be which makes me want to push that much harder.
Mini Pumpkin Protein Muffins
Today I woke up in a fairly good mood but soooo ready to get back into the kitchen considering it’s been over a week now of no baking! I guess mentally it’s been good for me to be more flexible with eating different things that aren’t made by yours truly but gosh have I ever missed spending my time doing what I love.
Being in the kitchen is almost like meditation for me. I’m able to be creative, alone and have the freedom to do whatever with whatever I want .. To a certain extent of course. Anyways, this morning I finally decided to open up the can of pumpkin puree I brought back with me from Canada at Christmas time! I only have at the maximum 2 months left abroad which is bittersweet to say the least.
Recipe
Ingredients
1 tbsp psyllium husk
1 egg
2 tbsp pumpkin purée
1 scoop vanilla protein powder
1 tsp cinnamon
1/2 tsp baking powder
Directions
Start by preheating the oven to 350 degrees.
Whip egg and add in pumpkin puree. Mix in dry ingredients.
Place in mini muffin tins (This made 8)
Bake for 15 mins.
Enjoy 😀
Ditch the Diet Rules
If you’re hungry but you feel that you shouldn’t because of a specific diet rule that you’re allowing to control your life, EAT.
Everyone is different.
Some people will gain on 2500, some on 1000.
Some will do better on 6 small meals with no snacks, others need to eat all day to be satisfied.
Once I gave up the rules that I was essentially creating for myself based on everyone else’s journey I’ve found a lot more progress, mentally that is.
Take those rules that you’re currently following and throw them out the window and focus on YOU.
I can’t snack in the afternoon more than once
Breakfast shouldn’t be more than 500 calories
I need protein powder everyday to gain muscle
If it’s considered a “Bad” food or a “treat” I can’t eat it
Realistically speaking I struggle on a daily basis with eliminating these rules, especially if I focus on all of them at once, but what I have found helpful is to pick one or two a week to work at overcoming.
Since ditching the rules….
- I feel relieved that i’m focusing on my own body’s needs
- I don’t feel guilty if i’m eating at 11 pm even though other’s might not be.
- If I wake up starving, that’s good and if I don’t that’s fine too, I just know that I still need to eat.
- I can enjoy parties and social gatherings
- I’ve become more flexible with eating and don’t feel the need to plan 24/7, HELLO less stress.
What diet rules are you trying to overcome?
The Balanced Fit Foodie 